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Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Freedom and Respect

Recently one of my 14 year old sons went out with 2 girls and another boy to a Halloween attraction... we used to call this a double date, but this was not a date I was told, of course not a date, right. I have always insisted with all my children that if you visit another home I need to meet them, I want to know whom you are with. So I told him I need to meet her folks before I let you go, and he agreed (though slightly reluctantly!) We arrived and his friend, was very sweet and polite and met us outside, greeted me warmly  and said to him ( low so I was not expected to hear), "let's go do this, you ready". I followed them in and greeted her Mom and as we were speaking it dawned on me... "are you ready" meant "ready to meet my DAD". I suddenly felt cold, felt scared, felt ill! I have boys, Dad's hate boys, my son is a boy! Did I prepare my son for this? How do you prepare your son for this? Seamlessly my son reached out his hand and greeted her Dad,I  must say he was so polite and did all the things he was taught when meeting an adult. He made a good impression! He would like to date this girl, but she promised her Dad she would not date till she was 16 (my kind of guy). My son was disappointed but understood and agreed to be keep being good friends with her and doing all the fun friend things they do, as a group, not as a couple. Proud of her for upholding her promise to her and Dad and proud of my son for respecting the promise and choosing this ind of great girl in the first place. So I am venturing down this road of dating and girls and Dad's and all sorts of obstacles I am not sure how to negotiate yet, oh my this month I am learning to give them freedom.... which is harder than it seems, but worth it in the end.


  1. Sooo glad I'm not at that stage yet but it sounds like you raised him right!
    P.S. I also like that dad ;)

  2. Jody~ I can't believe I am here already, treasure every little moment! And thanks I think so far we are doing ok, they seem normal to me :-)