Monday, November 28, 2011

Things I have learned as a Mom...

A dear friend of mine became an Aunt to twins last week and I got to thinking so what have  I learned about being a parent in the past 14 years... so here goes..
  1. I know nothing~ when they were babies I learned as they learned~ then for a brief time I became the one to go to with questions... then 3rd grade math hit and they no longer memorize the multiplication tables.... and when the hit 13 automatically they begin to say... what do you know... so I figure I am back to square one.... nothing :-)
  2. Having children is placing your heart outside your body... it is free to roam, learn, grow, be hurt, love and do so many things, but it is so very scary...(My best friend from high school's Mom taught me this one when I had my twins, thanks Carole)
  3. Kids books are the best, they teach you so many great things that are useful through out life... sharing is good, lying is bad, love is great, god is good, poop stinks, everybody poops, Momma loves you and will love you forever.... 
  4. The instruction manual is not coming... ever.... we need to learn like they do, god does not give us something we can't handle, though at times it is very hard... the object is do your best and remember I am sorry works for Momma's too
  5. Give them wings, sheltering them is not the answer, let them fall down, let them be sad, let them be happy, but be there as their back up to fall back on for support, encouragement, a hug or a high five... just being there is the important part. Be part of every moment you have with your children
I think that's enough for now.... I am still learning and so blessed to be a Mom ....always.

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Thankful does not seem to cover it...

I know we are all thankful, thankful for our families, our jobs, our friends. But as a nurse I see so much that really does make me thankful for the little things. My youngest climbing in my lap in the morning to snuggle. My teens saying thanks Mom, love you, which is allot to say as a 14 year old I am discovering. My husband coming home and giving me a hug. So many people can not appreciate these sort of things every day. God has so blessed my family and myself. We have health, we have each other and we have the blessing he provided. Stop today and look around, think of someone you know is struggling, physically, emotionally, financially and be thankful for the little things and realize the are not so little. I love you my family so very, very much.

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Freedom and Respect

Recently one of my 14 year old sons went out with 2 girls and another boy to a Halloween attraction... we used to call this a double date, but this was not a date I was told, of course not a date, right. I have always insisted with all my children that if you visit another home I need to meet them, I want to know whom you are with. So I told him I need to meet her folks before I let you go, and he agreed (though slightly reluctantly!) We arrived and his friend, was very sweet and polite and met us outside, greeted me warmly  and said to him ( low so I was not expected to hear), "let's go do this, you ready". I followed them in and greeted her Mom and as we were speaking it dawned on me... "are you ready" meant "ready to meet my DAD". I suddenly felt cold, felt scared, felt ill! I have boys, Dad's hate boys, my son is a boy! Did I prepare my son for this? How do you prepare your son for this? Seamlessly my son reached out his hand and greeted her Dad,I  must say he was so polite and did all the things he was taught when meeting an adult. He made a good impression! He would like to date this girl, but she promised her Dad she would not date till she was 16 (my kind of guy). My son was disappointed but understood and agreed to be keep being good friends with her and doing all the fun friend things they do, as a group, not as a couple. Proud of her for upholding her promise to her and Dad and proud of my son for respecting the promise and choosing this ind of great girl in the first place. So I am venturing down this road of dating and girls and Dad's and all sorts of obstacles I am not sure how to negotiate yet, oh my this month I am learning to give them freedom.... which is harder than it seems, but worth it in the end.

Here we go!

So today I am embarking on a new quest, blogging. My friend Optimistic Mom, over at: Life in Hard, Laugh Anyway, got me reading and enjoying some great blogs and I thought I was ready to try it out!  So here I am! So many Mom's whom I have read are so inspired and I find comfort in knowing we are all learning as we go and searching for the instruction manual that should have come with our children. I feel like I have the elementary years done, been there know what to expect, though my nine year old is throwing in curve balls his big brother's never did! But the teen years, boy I am finding my way! I want to give them freedom, but teach them responsibility, let them learn and protect them from mistakes, shelter them but give them wings all while they test their boundaries and alternately fill my heart and break it! So I hope to share here, get advice, learn and grow as I move into this next phase with my oldest sons, and have fun enjoying my youngest as he grows and learns and help him realize he is 9 not 14 don't rush it!